Overall, I'm feeling the frustration of being different. Normally, it doesn't bother me to be different because I've been different from most people all my life in so many other ways. I guess I'm feeling like I want to be in the herd right now (unfortunately, the herd is being led to slaughter, to put it bluntly). I'm going to a meeting in Seattle in a couple of weeks and a friend sent me a list of vegan restaurants near the hotel. It's something of a vegan paradise. But the problem is, it's not healthy! A lot of vegan restaurants are trying to show that their food can be just as delicious as SAD food (Standard American Diet). Of course it is, if you add enough refined grains, sugar, salt and fat. Actually one of the restaurants looks to have more whole grain options so I can probably find options that are loaded with only a little sugar, and a lot of salt and fat. If I could avoid the salt which makes me all puffy because I'm not used to it, I wouldn't be so bothered by a few high-fat meals. So should I compromise? The good part of me resents having to compromise my health, and the devil on my right shoulder says, why compromise, go for it and enjoy all the things you miss. So they both resent compromise, but offer very different solutions.
The reason I am craving the SAD food isn't because it tastes any better. Today's berries and cream were delightful. I don't get why I'm tempted. I know what my health would be like if I ate this way all the time. I've lived on both sides of this and the results of eating healthy are dramatic. I know I don't want to go back. I enjoy my food. It even offers me financial stability and the opportunity to take rewarding but low-paying jobs, because my chances of having a heart attack or diabetes is near 0. Even my chances of getting cancer are decreased, though not completely because of my previous 45 years of eating unhealthy. So why on earth do I want to join the herd that is being led to slaughter? That really shows the power of our social needs. I'm a social creature. But I have to learn to satisfy my social needs while being different in the way I eat. I guess it is as simple as that.
When I'm in Seattle and I'm tempted by those vegan restaurants, the devil will be saying, how often do you get to go to a place with vegan comfort (junk) food? implying that I'll regret it if I'm in Seattle for a week and then leave without trying it. I know already this will be a powerful draw for me. I hope the silent angel will pop up and say, well, my home town now has a very good (I mean good-tasting) vegetarian restaurant full of vegan comfort (junk) food too. So if I regret it, I can always go there. So maybe I should just try resisting and see if I don't regret it. An why is the angel so da*@ silent anyway? I have to coach her all the time!
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